7-14-2010
2:45 a.m.
 
I watch
And he writhes
With some kind of strange
            Torment
I’m unsure as to why
            Exactly
He is so- oh, so tortured
I can make guesses
And assumptions
And make statements
Followed by questions
But I’m not sure
If he’ll open the door
And allow me further in

Flipping and fighting
Legs constantly twitching
    He is restless
    And so am I
This sensation of pain
That I feel from him
I’d do anything
To make it go away
Sometimes I’ll feel
That I try and
I lose
But I still feel like
        He feels
        That he’s losing more.
It’s then that I realize
The battle of selfishness vs. selflessness
And with a heavy conscious and heart
I try to fight the anxious energy
That I can feel radiate from
Somewhere within him.

I bet…
That HE has one of those lurking, disapproving, ever-present men;
        That sits in the chair…
                In the corner of his mind…
Only HE calls it his anxiety;
                His nervousness.
I see that it cripples his mind
And then cripples him, physically.
I don’t completely understand
                WhY
            He is so tortured; in such a constant state
            Of anguish, of stress and agony…
And I need to know WHY
So that I can attempt to understand
But really -
All I really want is to be able to make it
GO AWAY





Copyright K. Anne Smith